Congress is preparing to fund the non-funding of the government
I have recently been diagnosed with borderline nice guy disorder, but I’m getting it under control. Lots of thanks to the Tea Party branch of the Republican Party for helping me take steps in the direction of recovery.
While at Real Change last Tuesday to get some work done and take part in a weekly meeting, it was remarked by coworkers that I seemed a little out of sorts: “Why, Wes? What’s bothering you, Wes? Are you sad?”
Yes, I’m sad. Everything’s bothering me. The Republicans are destroying my country’s government.
You can’t repeal one law by repealing the whole government. It doesn’t make any sense.
I’ve been following the news, and Republicans tried to repeal the Affordable Care Act, also known as Obamacare, more than 40 times. They failed, so now they are trying to repeal it by vetoing the entire government.
“Look at the bright side, Wes,” I keep telling myself. Because I’m really deep down inside a very cheerful optimistic guy who just wants to get along and be all Mr. Smiles and Happy Zippity-Do-Dah to you, Mr. Barista. I’ll have my usual happy cup of drip and sit down and read my happy, zippity newspaper, and they shut down my government.
There is no bright side. Mr. Smiles is dying inside zippity this.
Wait, no, there has to be a silver lining. Oh, hey, here’s one. You know all those corporations that we commie liberals despise? They do business with the U.S. government.
So now they will have to lay workers off, too. Let’s bring down capitalism while we’re at it.
Things have gotten so surreal I can’t make up anything that’s stupider than what is happening.
Congress, which can’t fund the government, is now preparing to fund the non-funding of the government. I’m not making that up — I don’t have to — the stupidity just keeps coming all by itself.
This is how it works.
After however long the government is unfunded so federal workers will have been furloughed for that many days or weeks, and the government is funded again (cross your fingers, kids), the proposed law funding the non-funding would kick in, and all those employees who didn’t do their jobs during the unfunded period will be paid anyway for the jobs that they didn’t do on account of not being allowed to do them, on account of the government not being authorized to pay them to do their jobs at the time that they would have done them.
So what are the Tea Partiers then, closet communists?
They want to pay government employees for not working?
Why don’t they just make that the new policy? Let’s pay everyone for not working all the time. To each according to their need, from each according to, aw heck, let’s just stick with “to each.” It’ll all be fine.
Communism is fun, isn’t it?
And we all know how well it works. Ha,ha, I said “works.” See? I still don’t get it. It’s not supposed to work, they don’t want anybody or anything to work.
No. They’re not closet communists. That’s why the whole thing is so stupid.
I can’t even conceive of the level of idiocy required to conceive such a plan, and I’ve devoted my entire life to conceiving stupid ideas.
I take that back, I can conceive the level of idiocy, that would be level 11, but I can’t imagine how the hamster could get the wheel spinning so fast. It’s just a hamster. It eats peas and popcorn. It’s not rocket powered.
Here’s another good one.
I’m not making this up either.
Almost all the unemployment caused by the shutdown, in both the public sector and private, will be unofficial. It won’t go on the government’s unemployment reports.
Do you know why? Because there won’t be any government unemployment reports until this is over because Congress won’t pay anyone to prepare them.
But they’ll pay them after this is over, for not having prepared them.
CommentsHi Do you consider Amish and Quakers and the like... commune-ists? They certainly work very hard, but not for the pyramid scheme called capitalism. How about military society? All members on the same team, all treated fairly, all given basic needs without the need for money, using custodianship instead of ownership, etc. Do you know that the military operates under a policy "To hurt ONE member of TEAM, hurts ALL of TEAM"? Sounds like a commune to me. Communications, community, communion, all words based on commune and all the best things in life. By chance, do you have a rather strict definition of communism? Do you think the U.S. public library system, operating wonderfully with its custodianship instead of ownership, and without a drop of racial or monetary discrimination, is a somehow a bad thing? Its a commune. Mr. Browning... I think its time you took a fresh, open-minded look at communism and shake off some of that cold-war programming and baggage that you've attached to the term. Commune = all on the same team... and that is EXACTLY what is needed these days... as opposed to the every-person-for-themselves rat-racing and pyramid climbing. Competition is NOT healthy, and never was. Cooperation is healthy, but not cooperating with the competer's church called capitalism. Best Regards! Larry "Wingnut" Wendlandt MaStars - Mothers Against Stuff That Ain't Right (anti-capitalism-ists/anti-economy-usage) Bessemer, MI
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