October 24, 2012
Vol: 19 No: 43

Dr. Wes

Convention and Visitors Bureau members want your snapshots of ‘disorder’

by: Dr. Wes Browning

and it's not for their scrapbook

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Now that poor people who can’t pay the fare on Seattle’s downtown buses are out of their hair, Metro bus drivers are in bus heaven. They have no problems with passengers and they are cheerful and beaming with joy all the time.

Take, for example, the driver who ejected the women with a smelly baby, who was on the way to a hospital to get treatment for said smelly baby. I’m sure that driver was happy the whole time. All is right in the bus-driving world now that all the bothersome people are gone.

Last spring, before the Ride Free Area (RFA) was eliminated, I witnessed a similar incident. In a bus that was only half occupied, another callous inconsiderate mother who was taking her child to a clinic was required to remove the baby from a stroller and then the driver screamed at her because the now empty stroller was partially blocking the aisle. The stroller folded up, but wouldn’t fit under the seat. I thought the driver’s screaming tantrum would never stop, and my eardrums would split.

Thank goodness, with the RFA gone, drivers won’t ever again be driven to become so cranky. They’ll be positively bubbling over with cheer when telling mothers with oversized strollers to get off their buses.

We’ve all learned an important lesson here. Whenever some segment of a population becomes an inconvenience, shove them out of sight. Paradise will be your reward.

Seattle’s Convention and Visitors Bureau understands this. It’s calling upon decent comrades to “See it, Send it.” If you see a waste of a human being, take a picture and send it to the bureau, so that the bureau can pass on those pictures to our elected officials to induce them to start a proper pogrom against such undesirables.

Possible undesirables include homeless people and teenagers walking around with pit bulls, but I’d like to see a broadening of the definition of undesirable. There are so many more people that we could get rid of and not miss.

We’ve made a great start by getting rid of poor people from downtown buses. Now we need to carefully examine the remaining people who are still riding Metro. Some of the people paying those fares got their money in undesirable ways. Others are inconveniences, like mothers with babies, or old people who move to the back of the bus too slowly. Some of them are members of fraternities.

The other day, I couldn’t believe it. A drunk talked to me on the bus. Imagine that. What are drunks doing riding buses? Drunks ought to get cars. They shouldn’t inconvenience the bus riding public.

Another thing that ticks me off is an overcrowded bus. I hate it when I get on at the beginning of a route and the bus fills up, and then inconsiderate jackasses still get on and stand in the aisle next to me.

Remember, citizens, your elected officials can’t know who all the undesirables are unless you personally take pictures of undesirables and send them in. There are too many different kinds of subhuman dreck that need elimination.

Everyone: Help the Convention and Visitors Bureau define subhuman by taking part in the “See it, Send it” program.

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