After three years of managing the Real Change Vendor Program, I’ve finally snuck myself into the paper. Unfortunately I pulled this off by leaving Real Change and this position I love. Like many of the vendors I’ve had the honor to know, Real Change has supported my personal and professional growth. It’s time for me to move on to my next adventure, just a couple of blocks away to Downtown Emergency Services Center (DESC) where I’ll oversee shelter programs and scattered-site housing. As a parting gift, I’ll share with you the most important lessons I’ve learned here.
Everyone is doing their best.
Everyone is doing their best. I’m trying my best, you’re trying your best. This doesn’t mean any of us are as good as we can be, or that we can’t be better. It means that when I make a mistake, I hope you will give me the benefit of the doubt that I’m doing the best I can and that I’ll grow from this experience. Accepting this reality has helped me to see other people as I see myself: a good but flawed person doing their best.
Everyone is trying to survive.
Everyone is trying to survive. This one is tricky, because “survival” doesn’t look the same depending on who or where you are. For example, a CEO in a boardroom does things to demonstrate their power and control through their words and their actions. This is no different than a person sleeping outside who carries a bat, speaks loudly and doesn’t back down when challenged. This person is also demonstrating their power and control to keep them safe and meet their needs. However we revere the CEO and fear the homeless person. We are all using the same physiological tools humans have to survive. The difference is not in our available tools, but the environment in which we use them.
Our differences are not real.
Our differences are not real. The things that divide us are more fiction than fact. Regardless of how any of our behaviors differ, we are all motivated by the exact same things: to be safe, to be valued and live free from pain. Regardless of your age, religion, gender, orientation, health, etc. we all need and want those same things. I may not understand what people are feeling or experiencing, but I can approach them knowing that their reality is no less real to them than my reality is to me. This has helped me to see my own humanity in others, rather than creating unnecessary and illogical barriers that separate us.
Though our differences are not real, the isolation is.
Though our differences are not real, the isolation is.
Homelessness is an issue we choose to ignore and pretend not to see. Look people in the eyes. Don’t say “no” before you hear what someone says. Don’t avoid people for your comfort. See people as you want to be seen.
Thank you to all the vendors, readers, volunteers and staff who made my last three years special.
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