I want to take a break from all the negativity this week and set aside all the fears and anger about how the next few years are shaping up. Let’s look for the silver linings we know are out there. Let’s use our magic silver-lining lenses.
Thanks to the coming bad, I will get all the reading done I always planned to do. I’ll finish “Moby Dick.” I will start James Joyce’s “Ulysses.” My copies of those two have just enough pages put together that if I read one page a day I will be propelled past Jan. 20, 2020. Won’t I be happy then? If not, I’ll start the collected works of Tolstoy in the original Russian, after taking time out to learn to read Russian, and boy, time will just fly by.
It’s like the wheels on the bus song. Recently I got a pneumonia shot. My doctor explained that I needed one because I’m old. I don’t like when people stab me with needles. So I found a way to distract myself. I recalled the wheels on the bus. By the time I got to “the horn on the bus goes beep, beep, beep,” I was putting on my coat and walking out of the clinic.
How bad can it be that Ben Carson becomes head of Housing and Urban Development? He was so precious when he said he couldn’t run a federal agency because he didn’t know how. Then, having heard Ben say that, Donald offered Ben control over hud. So what does that tell you? It tells me that before Ben’s incompetence to run hud becomes an issue, there won’t be a hud. Problem solved!
It’s like, your reckless loser son fails his third driving course in a row, so the school won’t take him as a student anymore, so you give him the keys to your Porsche and tell him to go practice on that. You must not have wanted that Porsche. But look at it on the bright side: You didn’t want that Porsche! Ha ha! And there it goes!
Then there’s the Trump Effect.
Because Trump won’t distance himself from racists, White supremacists think he’s their man, and they won the election. The Trump Effect is beautifully illustrated by the notion that a Black man can’t be a Mall of America Santa, because “Santa is White, and we won the election.” This kind of thinking can bring disaster to this country.
So we won’t have to waste money to see disaster films ever again! We’ll live them. Think of the money you’ll save, and your kids will love the entertainment.
“Daddy, can I go out and play in a riot?”
“Have you finished your homework?”
“Heck no, Daddy.”
“That’s my boy. Get out there and make America great again.”
Thanks, Trump.
The Trump Effect also means that if anyone says anything bad about Trump and Trump tweets about how awful they are, those who say “we won the election” will gang up on said person. This happened to Indiana union leader Chuck Jones last week. Jones remarked about the fact that Trump lied his patootie off when he announced the deal to save jobs at that one company in that state. Well, Trump did lie, we can read what he said and can compare it to the truth. He inflated the number of jobs that were saved.
But then, Trump tweeted what a bad guy Chuck Jones was for calling him a liar (which I remind you Trump emphatically is), so various “we won the election” people have been making death threats against Jones.
All of which means that we can close down all the public schools. We don’t need history books and history teachers. We can learn the hard lessons of history every day now. Want to know how the Roman Empire collapsed? Look around you, kids! You have a “leader” who only incites and doesn’t lead morally. Nero, Caligula, who cares about those losers? We’ve got our own example right here in the 21st century.
Every dark cloud must have a silver lining, for this is the best of all possible worlds. So keep your chin up and march to a happy tune!
The driver on the bus goes move on back, move on back, move on back.