In 2003, just before my graduation from high school, I lost my mother, and a few months later my dad passed away. Life had to go on. I continued post-secondary education specializing in electro-radiology. It would not have been possible without the help of my aunt, who gave me shelter through this period. After obtaining professional qualifications I had to go back to Hajnówka to look after my sick grandparents. There I decided to carry on with further education.
In November, at the beginning of the second year of my higher studies, I made a decision of great significance to my future life. I told family and friends that I was gay. I want to tell you this, too, because I want to live in harmony with myself. I know so well how such confession can turn one’s life upside down. My life was already in turmoil, and this made it worse.
In this harsh reality, however, there was something that gave me a lot of satisfaction: It was electro-radiology. In June 2010, the Children’s Health Center in Warsaw offered me an internship. At the same time I started yet another course; this time it was Social Studies.
The future looked brighter. And then my grandfather died. A few months later, when I was working at Alzheimer Patients’ Center, I had a mental breakdown followed by clinical depression. I found consolation in alcohol. I neglected everything: family, friends, school. I spent all my money on drink. I took out loans.
In mid-January 2012 it dawned on me that what I was doing was just so wrong. I realized that alcohol was not the solution but only an escape from problems. Not the way to go. I knew that I needed a specialist, but I waited a long time. Only at the end of May, with the support of a friend who made an appointment for me to see a psychologist, I made a step in the right direction. Psychotherapy helped me a lot.
Slowly I started to sort my life out. Soon I found a permanent job as a security guard. A few weeks later I learned about WSPAK [the street paper in Warsaw]. With nothing to lose I decided to try selling the street paper. I also knew that there I would meet people who, just like me, did not have an easy life. This was a very good decision.
My dreams and plans for the future? First of all I would like to get back into working as an electro-radiologist. With that I feel like a fish in water. This is my world. I also love to sing. I would like to develop my musical talent, and I secretly hope that one day, sometime in the not too distant future, I can make a record. WSPAK and the people there taught me that everything is possible. Now I believe that there are just beautiful moments ahead.